Six. Five. Oh.

Histon vs Boston United

This weekend saw a rare trip south for the Pilgrims.  These trips are usually characterised by expensive beer and irritating saven accents commenting about "weird people asking for gravy on their chips", anyone would think that people from the little village of Histon had never been north of Watford Gap.  I've never really liked trips south, which considering I've lived there for several years is a bit odd, but this one had something a little bit special to make up for the £3.50 beers.  This match saw the cementing of a legend in the history books as Paul Bastock made his 650th appearance for Boston United in his two spells since originally signing in 1992.  The man surely qualifies for the accolade of Pilgrims' cult hero.  Hopefully he'd have a better chance to celebrate than he did last week when his heroics limited Altrincham to only six goals!

The travelling fans make some noise.

Boston bolstered the shaky defence of the last match by the addition of Canoville and White in place of Fairclough and Austin.  The lacklustre attack was also spruced up by the addition of Lee for Burrow up front and Newsham, Sleath and Semple were started in the middle of the park in place of the other Fairclough, Hall and Wilkinson.  The team looked to have a much better balance than the previous week but this didn't stop normal service being resumed as United conceded on eight minutes.  Sparkes running clean past White and putting the ball past United's legendary 'keeper.  Here we go again...

There's a steward in the sticks...

... Or not.  The Pilgrims looked much better than last week and were level a further eight minutes later when 'tap-in' Newsham converted a harshly given penalty for handball in the box.  The game struggled to get going with both sides having the odd chance.  Newsham, unlucky not to score a second as the ball bounced off him and flew narrowly wide leaving the teams going into the break level-pegging.

The second-half saw a much more dominant performance from the Pilgrims.  Mulready smashed one over and Newsham failed to convert another quality cross from a much improved Semple.  Semple was a huge threat from the Boston wing, his crosses and free-kicks supplying the ammunition to Armstrong and Newsham but it was Jelleyman supplying Sleath which put Boston ahead.  The warning signs were there for Histon as Jelleyman put the ball onto Gaffer Lee's head, who nodded down for Sleath hammer wide; minutes later Jelleyman put Sleath through directly and he finished neatly.

The game was out of Histon's reach five minutes later.  Lee headed the first cross from Semple wide but made no mistake with the second moments later as he knocked the ball home, just, to put the game out of reach.  Lee had two more chances to convert with his head before subbing himself off and Semple missed the chance to top off a superb attacking performance with a 25 yarder just over.

The new kit get's its first outing.

As Boston made changes, Histon managed their only chance of the half but couldn't test Bazza on what was a quiet 650th appearance; Holman making a right hash of his shot.  I thought Stainfield had put away Boston's fourth, the official site says it was Burrow but in the end it was neither as the referee ruled it out for some imaginary foul as far as I can tell.  White took the final chance of a dominant Pilgrims outing, heading wide.

Much better from United, not that it was possible to be much worse!  Hopefully the better balance can be maintained and built on throughout the remainder of the season.

Next-up: Hopefully a struggling Workington side at York St.

No football today...

Altrincham vs Boston United 

... Not from Boston United at least!  Worst United performance since the mighty Captain Clean was at the club.  Worst defeat I can remember since Grimsby won 6-0 at York St and everyone and their mum walked out before the end.  To coin a phrase: What a load of rubbish!  Boston's week got off to a flyer by losing at Kidsgrove and going out of the FA Cup at the first available opportunity, AGAIN!  That has happened far, far too many times in the last few years and is costing the club money and supporters.

TWO teams come out at Moss Lane, although you'd never have known it!

To recover from this shocking defeat and, from what I heard, equally shocking performance; United did the obvious thing and made several changes including dumping our best midfielder out of the squad at a cold and rainy Moss Lane.  Perfect.  Both Faircloughs played on the same side, either that or I'd had one too many beers and was seeing double.  They are, after all, exactly the same player.  "Utility" player ("utility", I have learned, is code for s***), Armstrong, played alongside Wilkinson in the midfield.  I say midfield but they very, very rarely spent any time in the middle of the park, in fact the only players that made it into the centre circle were the Altrincham midfield passing it about with impunity and the Boston strikers kicking-off after conceding yet another goal.

Some rare quality possession for United.

The defence was, erm, not very good.  That's pretty diplomatic actually, there are a lot worse things that could be said of them.  I learned at primary school that the ball should never be allowed to bounce by a defender; seemingly that isn't something that the United defenders are aware of.  The defence hadn't exactly covered itself in glory by the time the first Alty goal arrived on 15 mins; it was entirely Austin's fault as the ball arrowed in across the front of him and he just stood there and watched it go past, followed by Reeves going past him, followed by the ball in the net.  15 mins later and Alty were two up as Lawrie, made best use of the several acres of space gifted to him, to put the ball past Bazza.

The goals were arriving at regular intervals, the next one coming just after half-time.  Lawrie, searching for his second, saw his shot rebound off Bastock only to be headed in by Reeves.  That might sound like Bazza's fault but when Alty can have strikers lining up to put chances away with no one marking them it's not surprising he struggled.  You know it's bad when there are opposition players stood on the corner of the penalty area following a set piece and the goalkeeper is the closest defender...

Alty waste yet another free header in the United box.

The goals maintained the regular flow of one every 15-20 minutes except this time it was Boston who put one away.  One sub set up another with Semple putting in an excellent cross for gaffer Lee to head home at the back stick.  The reason this was the only United chance I have mentioned is that, as far as I remember, it's the only one that we had.  Mulready, the new lad from Grimsby, didn't play badly but it's difficult to create chances when you never get the ball.

Alty stepped up the pace following this "set-back" and put 3 more past a woeful United team in the last 15 minutes.  Reeves practically walked through Jelleyman to complete his hat-trick.  Then five minutes before full-time Mulholland set up Twiss before scoring his own goal to make it 6-1 and complete United's humiliation.  I've only written about the Altrincham goals because if I were to write about all the chances that they didn't convert I'd be here all week!  Suffice to say that Bastock was United's best player and Alty could have had double figures were it not for him.

Next weeks thrashing will be away at Histon.

United don't do cup competitions...

Boston United vs Kidsgrove Athletic

Boston fans of recent years have had a less than romantic experience of the FA Cup.  Since returning to non-league United have been unceremoniously dumped out of the world's premier cup competition in glamour-ties against the likes of Workington, Cambridge, Lowestoft and Worcester; in fact United have failed to go on a non-league cup run since the 1997-98 season.  Kidsgrove provided the second qualifying round opposition for the Pilgrims.  That's Kidsgrove who sit in 15th in a league two levels below United with 11 points from a possible 27; the same Kidsgrove that United knocked out of the FA Trophy three years ago, beating them 6-0 at York St.  United made one change from the mid-week home win against Droylsden with Burrow replacing a very slightly injured Lee.

A rare Kidsgrove effort in the first half.

Kidsgrove had the better of the opening exchanges and were passing it through the United midfield with virtual impunity.  An under-pressure United received another blow as Tom Ward was forced from the pitch with an ankle injury, he was replaced by Austin with five mins gone.  In truth there was very, very little to write about in the first half with the afternoon heat adding to the distinct pre-season feel of the day.  This feeling was reflected in the most inanimate 16 away fans I have ever seen in York St, the 801 home fans weren't exactly pulsating either.

Despite Kidsgrove playing some neat passing football it was the Pilgrims who enjoyed the scant first-half chances.  Semple and White both putting the ball high and wide.  Burrow failed to worry the Athletic 'keeper following a set-up from Newsham and Sleath.  It was Newsham himself who finished off the drab first-half on a high with a headed effort drawing a brilliant save from Kidsgrove's shot stopper.

Two-footed lunge, not a red card
apparently.

Kidsgrove actually had a shot in the first few minutes of the second period and this seemed to galvanise United who stepped up a gear.  United were much crisper in the pass and began to draw late challenges from the Athletic players.  The ref seemingly completely lost the plot, giving free-kicks and bookings for nothing challenges while giving nothing for leg-breakers, two-footed dives and elbows in the face.  Boston should have been in front but Burrow couldn't control a good ball into his feet while inside the area and the chance slipped away.  Burrow was again guilty of profligacy as he and Newsham failed to get on the end of a great ball across the face of goal from Semple.

A free-kick saw Semple fire over as the fouls started to pile up.  Kidsgrove's Dave Walker was lucky to escape a straight red for a two-footed, flying lunge on Bastock, the Athletic (not athletic) front man had further luck when he again took exception to Bastock and seemed to kick him in the chest!  Walker kept pushing his luck though and finally received his marching orders when he decided it would be a great idea to hack down Austin without reason.  What an idiot.

Lee and Fairclough were introduced in place of Burrow and Newsham in an attempt to freshen the attack up.  It worked, to an extent.  Boston were flying now with superb, patient build-up play piling pressure on the visitors.  Sleath was denied from close range by the 'keeper and then on the line by a defender within seconds as United looked to walk the ball into the net.  White headed just over the bar from a Milnes corner, then did it again a minute or so later.  The luck really wasn't with White who had his next shot blocked by defensive partner, Austin; the United centre-back could've shot from six inches out into an empty net and he'd still have missed!

Boston pile on the pressure in the closing stages.

The final chance of the afternoon went to player/manager Jason Lee who got up well to draw a fantastic tip over the bar from the Kidsgrove 'keeper as the ten men held on for the replay.  It was astutely pointed out that the game was reminiscent of the 2009/10 FA Trophy tie against Quorn; we lost that replay...

Next up: Altrincham away.

Plan B

Boston United vs Droylsden

United were swiftly back in action at York St following the mid-week encounter with Hinckley.  Droylsden were the team who brought a close United's ten game unbeaten run last season.  The Bloods start to the season had been remarkably similar to the Pilgrims' with both teams having won four, drawn two and lost four; even the goal difference was identical.  The Pilgrims were looking to continue the good-ish form of mid-week and get a second win on the board.  The weekend and the much improved weather brought out a few more fans for this fixture, the attendance was still a worryingly low 1127.

A much sunnier York St.

The only change from Tuesday's encounter was the re-introduction of Jelleyman at left-back.  Both sides showed attacking intentions from the off, Sleath hitting the woodwork from an off-side position following a saved Milnes shot.  Droylsden had their own opening shot with a header flying narrowly wide of Bazza's post.  Hall was looking dangerous and playing some superb stuff on the wing alongside the always sublime Sleath.  Sleath it was who fashioned a difficult opportunity, firing a looping shot just over from the edge of the box whilst falling over.  Boston's next chance came in an odd manner to say the least, one of the Bloods defenders placing a belting volley just over after Semple's first real run of the game.  Despite the good play from Boston it was Droylsden finishing the half just on top with Bazza doing well to hold a sharp effort.

Boston were in front following the half-time break once again with Ward on the end of the Milnes corner this time round.  United were strong as Lee was denied by a good piece of goal-keeping.  Lee subsequently subbed himself off and Burrow came on to replace him.  This substitution signalled a change in the flow of the game as Drolysden asserted themselves.  Like the Hinckley game in mid-week there was a second goal in short order.  This time though it was Boston on the receiving end.  Kilheeney taking advantage of a rare Ward/Bazza mix up to slot home an equalizer.  Boston were under pressure and Droylsden should have been in front following a Jelleyman mistake.

The team celebrate Tom Ward's goal.

Ben Fairclough was brought on in place of Newsham as Boston, for the first real time this season, switched to "Plan B"!  The pace of Fairclough, and to a lesser extent, Burrow was telling and the Pilgrims went back on the offensive.  Fairclough nailed one wide before Burrow got up well and headed down, doing everything right, but seeing the ball fly just over the bar.  The Bloods had the odd chance but it was United who took the lead minutes later.  The ball wasn't cleared properly and Burrow got up well again, this time his header found the back of the net to put the Pilgrims into a deserved lead.

United should have put the game to bed as some excellent work from Semple saw him clean through on goal but his decision making was poor and he ultimately chipped it tamely into the 'keepers arms.  This nearly cost United as Bastock had to pull out two superb saves to keep the Bloods at bay in the closing stages of the match.  Despite these scares the Pilgrims held on to claim six points out of six.

Next-up: Kidsgrove Athletic at York St in the 2nd qualifying round of the F.A. Cup.

HINCKLEY!!!

Boston United vs Hinckley United

The teams shake hands under the floodlights.

Boston United came into this fixture searching for their opening home win of a listless season so far.  The Leicestershire club provided the opposition for the night and deranged cries of "Hinckley" coming from the home fans may, to the uninitiated, have suggested that York St was full of mentally unstable people; it probably is to be fair.  Not as many mentally unstable people as usual turned up on the turgid Tuesday night, a disappointing 813 in attendance for the competition between one of the weakest strike-forces and one of the most profligate defences in the league.

Jason Lee picks himself on a
miserable night at York St.

United were trying to shore up their flagging front-line by introducing player/manager, Jason Lee, in place of Mikel Suarez.  Hinckley, seemingly much improved from last season, looked the most dangerous in the early stages.  Clarke and Kerry both narrowly off target while a deflected Reynolds shot pinged off the Pilgrims' crossbar.  The despite playing some improved football the Pilgrims could only muster a Ryan Semple effort which flew past the far post.  Semple was having the best of Boston's efforts and was handed another opportunity to score, unfortunately this effort was dragged past the near post this time round.  Hinckley should have been one up at the break but Clarke couldn't convert a golden opportunity from a few yards out.

New boy Stainfield, fresh from a trip out to the States, came into the line-up to replace Kevin "Keith" Austin at left-back.  I'd been reliably informed by my Boston Town contact that Stainfield should be about the right level for our reserves.  This was thrown into doubt six minutes into the second period when a towering Stainfield header planted the ball firmly past ex-Pilgrim Dan Haystead in the Hinckley goal.  This triggered a frenetic period of end to end football in which Milnes hit the crossbar before Jason Lee expertly chested the ball back to Sleath who finished with a 25 yard half-volley to put the Pilgrims two in front.

United attack a sparsely populated Town End.

Boston seemed to switch off and Hinckley tried hard to force a way back into the match in the closing 30 minutes; Newton saw a couple of good chances go away from him.  Suarez and new boy Ben Fairclough replaced Lee and Semple respectively as the Pilgrims went for pace up front.  Yes, pace!  Boston had to clear one off the line and be saved by the off-side flag before finishing the game the stronger side with Suarez and Fairclough both being denied before the final whistle.

Next-up: Boston United vs Droylsden at York St.

It's All A Bit Mickey Mouse

England vs Wales and Boston United vs Solihull Moors

Wembley: Theatre of boredom.

I was going to write a blog post about the England - Wales game but it was uninspiring and frankly pretty rubbish so I didn't have the will to do it before the Solihull game rolled around.  This game was also an appalling display of "football" and so I thought "why not dump these two together into one really depressing blog post?"  So now the scene is set here is what happened...

1,700 odd Welsh fans.

England took on Wales at Wembley in the hopes of securing a win and a foot in the door of Euro qualification. Anyone who watched the game will have seen what can only be described as a "professional" showing from an England team who so often lack the creativity needed to excite.  England went 1-0 up through a neat Ashley Young goal but had a lucky escape when Earnshaw missed an open goal from a couple of yards out deep into the second half.  It would be fair to say that the only ones drawing any inspiration from the drab and boring Wembley surroundings were the Welsh players and their meagre 1,700 or so fans.  With the turnout at 77,000 the question surrounding the return of home internationals seems academic, there just isn't the interest from the public.  The evening was marred by the sad death of a Wales fan before the game.

Coincidentally the first leg of England - Wales fell on the same day as Solihull's last league win, against Boston on the 27th of March.  Since then Solihull had gone 17 games without a win, only managing two draws in the process.  Boston have been playing some rubbish football, if you can call it that, recently and also have some sort of psychological issue with playing against teams who wear pink as matches against Nuneaton and Harrogate have shown.  With Solihull's poor run of form it was inevitable that United would mess up the chance to claim three points and that was exactly what happened.

Pink: United's bogey colour.

The York St Mickey Mouse
Show.

The home team started with Stones and Suarez up front while Newsham was pushed onto the wing in place of Holsgrove, so we're going for pace then.  Despite the ponderous front line the Pilgrims started the stronger and with only a few minutes gone it looked like Moors might be on the end of a right drubbing.  There were a couple of chances for Stones but when he did get to the ball his headers were either weak, off-target or saved by the impressive Singh in the Solihull goal.  Suarez was also unable to hit the target and put a difficult chance wide.  That was about it for United.

Solihull came into the game and made the Pilgrims look lacklustre and mediocre at best.  Much like England, Boston suffered from a chronic lack of creativity and there was seemingly no plan B.  As soon as the high ball into the box option had been sussed by the Solihull back-line, United were out of ideas.  Only Moors' profligacy saved Boston's blushes before the break and the home team walked off with boos ringing in their ears.

The second half saw more of the same dull rubbish from United.  This time Solihull were more accurate, Bastock flapped at a cross, the defence failed completely in their attempted clearances and Thompson-Brown slotted home his second chance of the half.  Holsgrove and Milnes were thrown on for Stones and Hall to chase the game but the reaction was toothless.  United had the odd chance, Semple heading on target from a difficult position while Milnes and Holsgrove shot wide, but the Pilgrims scarcely looked like troubling the Solihull defence who deservedly claimed their first points of the season.

Head in hands time for United.

As for United, something needs to change and fast; this game saw the first instance I've seen of fans calling for the managers to resign.  The attendance was 1,117 and with performances and results like that it won't stay above 1,000 for long so things really need to pick-up and quick.  Any pace up front, even if it came from the right back Jordan Fairclough, would be appreciated as a back-up plan at the very least.  At the moment the United game-plan is very, very predictable.

Next up: Boston United vs Hinckley at York St.

That's What You Get!

Bishop's Stortford vs Boston United

There were so many things wrong with United's trip to Bishop's Stortford.  To start with Bishop's Stortford isn't exactly in the north but that's old news now.  Secondly, Stortford is pretty much the only club in the world who can't spell their own name correctly, or at least I hope they are!  Thirdly, it was non-league day, a time to celebrate the best of non-league by dicking around with kick-off times and giving free-entry to those who don't give a toss while charging those who turn up every week £12 to get in.  Add that to the £3.20 for a beer and I can honestly say I don't really like this down-sarf lark, the fact you can take beer onto the terrace was a minor consolation to all this.

Welcome to Bishop's Stortfort F.C.
(credit to @craigsingleton for the picture)

Getting a lift to the ground was an adventure in itself, arriving outside the ground there was a sizeable queue of traffic.  This seemed a little odd as kick-off was still almost an hour away.  I know non-league day brings in extra ground hoppers who, in combination with the away support, would almost double Stortford's average attendance but this seemed excessive.  We were puzzling over this when a friendly fan popped over and informed us that we were actually sat in the queue for the local tip...  The bloke on the gate to the actual carpark let us know that the club are prohibited from signposting the ground, so good luck finding it!

The 'keeper claims the ball at Newsham's feet.

In the only change to the Pilgrims line-up Fairclough stepped in for Parker at right back.  Despite the vocal backing from the travelling support, mainly directed at the Lincoln fans alongside the Pilgrims on the terrace, the on-the-pitch action was uninspiring.  It seemed as though United hadn't realised it was an early kick-off and were still asleep; Stortford were on top.  Bazza had to be on good form to keep out several chances from Dwight Gayle as the southern club pressed.  Boston responded through Newsham and Hall but spent the majority of the first period under pressure.

United started to come back into the game as White, making up for an uncharacteristic error at the back, had a header blocked at the other end of the pitch.  Semple and Holsgrove were the catalyst for the Pilgrims' resurgence with ten minutes of the half remaining.  Good combination play between the two wingers and Newsham resulted in a couple of chances for Semple.  He put one high over the top and the other across the face of goal with Newsham coming close to slamming it in at the back post to ensure it was 0-0 at the break.

Boston apply pressure to the Stortford defence.

Changing ends at the break meant walking past the Blue Square Bet girls who sadly only turn out on non-league day, yet another thing you don't usually see at a non-league ground normally.  The second half was a scrappy affair with several bookings and a mammoth amount of time-wasting by the Stortford 'keeper.  United were battling through the interruptions and continuing to assert themselves.  Despite this Boston were unable to fashion many chances.  Ward heading wide, while the 'keeper added to the frustration by keeping Holsgrove out.

Bizarre changes were made to the line up as the lively Holsgrove was replaced by Suarez meaning two big men up front while Newsham switched out wide.  The much improved Hall, who comes to life alongside Sleath was replaced by Milnes too as the managers presumably looked to go to a more offensive line-up.  These changes saw the Pilgrims get forward more meaning that Stortford could be dangerous on the break.  More oddity arose when a strange incident in which Semple and Stortford's Phil Anderson seemed to forget the football and had a wrestling match.  I'm not sure what the ref or his assistant saw but they contrived to send off Anderson but not Semple; lucky.

Semple falls over in front of the Pilgrims' faithful.

With Stortford down to ten the Pilgrims went from their slightly more attacking formation back to the one they started with as Wilkinson came on for Sleath.  If you've struggled to follow the changes to personnel and formation then you aren't the only one!  Boston had the odd chance but were still being frustrated by the 'keeper wasting time at every opportunity.  The time wasting would come back to haunt Stortford in the sixth minute of added time; White flicked the ball down to Newsham in the home team's box and he calmly turned and slotted home the winner capping a very average performance on the road.

Next up: England vs Wales at Wembley.